{
}It's dark but warm. The humidity is high. The house is behind you and you can hear the sound of the party through the wall. You look out into the dark garden and listen to the insects. You take a deep breathe and
[[walk into the darkness]]
[[return to the party]]The light from the house fades after a few steps. You follow the path under your feet until you reach the garden gate. You unlatch it and head into [[the city]].You walk back into the party. The room is lit with lamps and candles and the windows are open to keep the space cool. Music is playing and people are talking. You head into [[the kitchen]].Away from the house, you hear the muted city sounds. All of the concrete around you seems to be radiating heat. You don't recognise the model of street lamp. It's like you're in another country.
[[Head towards the center of town->the suburbs]]
[[Stay on the outskirts->the suburbs]]There's a tub filled with icy water and a few beers. Some bottles of wine, one unopened. Some supermarket branded vodka from two different supermarkets, an unopened bottle of a fruit liqueur with a label written in an unknown language and three bottles of elderflower cordial.
[[Fix a hard drink->your friend]]
[[Have some elderflower cordial->your friend]]You start walking. You don't know the neighbourhood very well. The last time you were here was several years ago, you assume you wouldn't be able to remember any of it but it seems like you have a type of spatial memory. Some of the roads look familiar when they join to other roads, or the radii of their curves. You look at the houses and the cars parked outside of them. There is hardly anyone else outside right now. All of the shops are closed. The houses seem quiet and are all different. Some of them have low, flat roofs, others have wooden frames, small balconies that open onto the road, high windows. You think of all the interiors of all the houses that you will never see.
[[Keep walking]]You take a sip of your drink when your old friend comes up to you.
"It's great to see you again. I feel like it's been forever."
It feels longer than forever, it feels like you made this old friend up, that they're a combination of other people you knew. Maybe you know them but only from the internet. Maybe you've only seen their face in videos. You feel like you've done something together that made you close but now you can't remember their name.
[[Make small talk]]You find yourself on a small high street. There are shops here, mostly dark and shuttered except for the 24 hour convenience store. The lights they use there are bright and white. They bounce off the pavements strangely and make the concrete underneath them seem glazed. The ground is dry and you can hear a car screech somewhere in the distance. You go into the convenience store. You want to feel the luxury of buying something.
[[Buy a savory snack->the park]]
[[Buy a sweet snack->the park]]You try to make small talk but find yourself making things up, spinning out lies that you can't back up or defend and changing the topic whenever your friend starts to unpick what you're saying. You say that you came to the party by train even though you caught a taxi, that you've been working as a therapist for computer programmers, that you have been learning to cook. You forget the lies as you tell them. Your friend nods with a distant look to their face, like they're thinking of something else.
[[Mention the good time you shared together->conversation]]
[[Mention the bad time they were there for you->conversation]]Your friend nods, as though they hadn't heard you.
"I had totally forgotten that happened. You reminding me, it's like you've revealed something about myself that I never realised before"
You try to shrug it off
"I had forgotten that I acted like that, that I valued those things. I no longer value them. I would never act that way again."
[["Like they say, the only thing that stays the same is change"->the car]]
[["Everything changes, all we can do is adapt."->the car]]You walk out of the shop with your snack in hand and tear open the packaging. For a moment you think of the genesis of this moment, the many ingredients, grown, harvested, refined, combined, manufactured, packaged, marketed, distributed, stacked and paid for. The snack in your hand the physical artifact of this system. All of that thinking, energy, transformation. Does it exist as something other than the physical products it exudes.
[[Yes->the road]]
[[No->the road]]Your friend seems like they agree with you. You tell them you have to go home now. It's late. All of the clocks in this house have stopped because of a rare and bizarre disruption to earth's magnetic field.
"Oh, I live nearby, I'll come with you, we can take the bus together. Which bus should we catch."
[[The bus that is quiet, but means you have to walk further if you catch it->the bus stop]]
[[The bus that is busy, but it stops exactly where I need to be->the bus stop]]You're in that part of town that feels like they built it for a game or a training exercise. Like they built a town in a warehouse and then let it fall apart. When you walk around, you feel like you can hear the sound of rain on a thin roof above you.
[[Walk faster to get away->walk]]
[[Walk slower to soak it up->walk]]There's no one else at the bus stop. It's so warm that you might as well still be inside.
You tell your friend you don't take the bus much anymore.
"I love the bus. Why don't you catch the bus anymore."
[[I've started walking everywhere->the bus]]
[[I've started driving everywhere->the bus]]You think about how it feels to have a day with a party in it. To spend the morning and the afternoon on one thing, then to get ready and go out, leave the house, travel a distance, arrive elsewhere and stay up late, then go back in the warm darkness that surrounds you now.
[[It feels cloying, decadent. Like the last act in a 7 act play. Something with too many intervals and set changes->Arrive]]
[[Everything is so brief, how many parties will there be in your lifetime? How many bright flashes of warmth like this are left?->Arrive]]You look out of the window of the bus at everything passing by and try to think about what it is that the movement of a vehicle does to everything you see through it.
[[The propulsive, modern sensation of travel gives everything seen through the windows of a bus a triumphant, energetic feel.->the car park]]
[[The snatched glances of things seen from a vehicle remind you of the melancholy of distance, the inevitability of time, and emparts the scene with a mournful, elegiatic tone.->the car park]]You're near your destination now. The view from the bus window becomes more familiar, you recognise the order of the stops. The sun is beginning to rise. You and your friend stand up, walk towards the doors surefootedly. When the doors open the air outside is cool, fresh, you walk out onto the pavement. Your friend pats your arm. They say:
"If you hadn't come back into the party, you would have still ended up here."
[[Go into the car park]]You've been walking so long that the sun is beginning to rise. You're more certain that you recognise the streets around you now. You know exactly where you need to go. A bus pulls up next to you, one person gets out, an old friend. You remember they were also at the party, you saw their face in the crowd but you never spoke. They pat your arm and say:
"If you hadn't left the party, you would have still ended up here."
[[Go into the car park]]You duck under a barrier and walk into the car park. Brand new and totally empty. The ceiling of each floor is an embossed rectangular pattern, repeating in the concrete. You walk up the steps. The tiles on the floor seem much older than the rest of the structure. You wonder how many millions of shoes will walk on them in the years to come.
When you reach the top deck of the car park you step out. It's not a tall structure, but it's high enough to provide you with a view. The sky is turning a teal colour as the sun shines through the pollution that hangs there, and you watch all the street lamps turn off as its light strikes the sensors they use to detect [[sunrise]].The End
Thank you for reading.